Coping with Grief During the Holidays

By: Courtney Steward, LCSWA

The holidays can be extremely hard when you’re missing someone you love. Grief doesn’t follow a calendar, and the extra reminders of absence can feel overwhelming. It’s okay to let yourself feel. Reach out for emotional support when you need it, talk about your loved one, or write them a letter. Allow yourself to smile at the memories without guilt and cry without shame. Feeling both joy and sorrow at the same time is a natural part of the grieving process.

Think of grief like a wave … some days it’s gentle, and other days it hits harder than you expect. Both moments are real and valid. When grief feels overwhelming, small grounding practices can help you feel more centered:

• The 5-4-3-2-1 Check-In: Notice five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste.

• Box Breathing with Grounding Words

Inhale for 4 counts- say “here.”

Hold for 4 counts - say “I’m safe.”

Exhale for 4 counts- say “this will pass.”

Hold for 4 counts - say “I’m supported.”

Repeat this as needed!

• Use warmth for comfort: Hold a cozy/weighted blanket, a warm mug, or place a hand over your heart.

• Touch: Hold an object that reminds you of your loved one, like a photo, piece of jewelry, or a gift from them.

• Gentle distraction: Activities like folding laundry, coloring, or doing a puzzle can soothe without forcing emotional energy.

You can move through the holidays at your own pace. Your grief doesn’t cancel the joy you feel, and your joy doesn’t take away the love you carry. Both can exist together, and by honoring your emotions while using small grounding practices, you can find moments of connection, comfort, and even peace during this season.