Becoming Without Apology Series - Part 3

Part 3: Learning to Say No Without Explaining Yourself

By Cree Jones, LMFT

*We are doing a 5-part series about becoming a more unapologetic you. We would love your insights and some of your answers to our blog questions with this series! This is a great time to reflect on yourself as well as bring some of these questions/answers back to your therapist.*

People-pleasing often begins as a way to stay safe.

You learn that being agreeable keeps the peace, that over-explaining reduces conflict, and that minimizing your needs keeps relationships intact.

Over time, this pattern costs you clarity, energy, and self-trust.

Learning to say no without defending, justifying, or apologizing is a profound act of healing.

No is a complete sentence.
So is “That doesn’t work for me.”
So is “I’m not available for that.”

You do not owe everyone your reasoning. You do not need permission to honor your limits.

Healthy boundaries are not harsh.
They are honest.

The people who respect you do not need an explanation. They trust your truth.

Reflection Questions – Part 3

• What emotions come up when you think about saying no without explaining yourself?
• Who do you feel most obligated to justify your decisions to?
• How has over-explaining protected you in the past?
• What do you fear might happen if you set a boundary without elaboration?
• What would change in your life if you trusted that your needs are valid as they are?